The little old lady shakes her finger at the first officer and says accusingly, “And, I’ll bet that liar told you I was speeding too!!” - Submitted by Mrs. “Ma’am, can you pop the trunk, please?” “Certainly officer.” He steps back, but, it is completely empty. He looks at it, then hands it back to her.
“This looks good.” “Can I see the registration to this car?” She reaches into her purse again and hands it to him.
“Ma’am, can I see your license, please?” “Of course, officer.” she smiles sweetly and pulls out a license from her purse. The Chief of Police steps out and walks over to the woman’s window. Within minutes there are sirens blaring, lights flashing, half a dozen police car are surrounding the woman’s car. I feel so bad.” “Ma’am, DON’T MOVE.” The officer frantically calls in to his walkie-talkie….
I stole the car and I killed the driver he’s in the trunk.
He tries again, “Well then, can I please see your registration?” She hangs her head and says, “I apologize officer. It didn’t take long before a police man pulls her over and says “Ma’am, can I see you license, please?” She says “I’m sorry, officer, but I got it revoked two years ago for drunk driving.” She is going 65 on a street where the speed limit is 40. “Now I know where my hearing aid went.” - Submitted by Ron Ashland Clean Jokes for Senior Citizens: There was this little old lady who was late for church. The doctor poked his light scope in the old man’s ear and said, “Hey, you have a suppository in your ear!” (Wait for it.) - She smiled and explained, "I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go." (Oh, just hush-up now and send this one on to somebody who needs a laugh.) ha!”Ĭlean Jokes for Senior Citizens: One of the shortest wills ever written: “Being of sound mind, I spent all the money.” -Submitted by Arthur BlandĬlean Jokes for Senior Citizens: The old man was sitting on the examining table in the doctor’s office having his hearing checked. The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20's, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40's, and a preacher when in her 60's, and now - in her 80's - a funeral director. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living.
The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation.